I could fill a book with tales of my years with Walter Surrey; in fact, I just may do that. But for now, I’ll continue here with a story of some of my U.S.-China adventures.

Having worked with Richard Nixon and Henry Kissinger in the reopening of relations with the People’s Republic of China (PRС) — more commonly known then as “Red” China — Walter naturally encouraged some of his corporate clients to become more involved in doing business there. And as Chairman of the National Council for US-China Trade (now the US-China Business Council), and legal counsel for the Embassy of the PRC in Washington, he was uniquely positioned to assist his clients in establishing some very successful joint ventures and other commercial relationships in Beijing, where he traveled frequently and several times met with Chinese leader Deng Xiaoping. In fact, China became the principal focus of his work for many years.

It was not unusual, therefore, for meetings to be held in our offices with representatives of the Chinese Embassy, as well as dignitaries visiting Washington from China. One such occasion involved negotiations for the establishment of a joint venture between a multinational corporate client and the China Council for the Promotion of International Trade (CCPIT), for which their representatives had flown in from Beijing. After a week of discussions, involving much wining and dining and bowing and cowtowing, an agreement was finally hammered out. When it was over, I was responsible for arranging a celebratory luncheon at an authentic Chinese restaurant. When I told the restaurant manager that we were bringing a delegation from Beijing, they pulled out all the stops.

Our group — about ten or twelve people, including two interpreters — were seated at a large round table in a quiet alcove, and were being served from the banquet menu. Dish after dish of the most incredible food made their way around the table. Seated to my right was a rather plump Chinese gentleman who spoke no English, and who seemed to have taken a liking to me. As the food was passed to him, he would serve himself, and then begin scooping food onto my plate.

Now, I had recently succeeded in losing those last five stubborn pounds that so many of us have to deal with, and was determined not to gain them back. So, as my new friend prepared to load me up with yet another plateful, I tried to make myself understood by shaking my head from side to side, and holding a hand above my plate. Then I placed my hands by my sides and — still shaking my head — said, “No, no. Fat. Fat.” To which the smiling gentleman, clearly understanding my meaning, bobbed his head up and down, and proceeded with great glee to plop yet another spoonful of food onto my plate.

Walter told me later that my benefactor was possibly searching for an American wife to take back to China with him, but that I was not quite curvy enough to make the grade and needed to be fattened up a bit. And to think . . . I could have spent the last 40 years living in China, happily not dieting. Damn!

But though I was able to make my escape on that occasion, it wasn’t to be my last offer from our friends from the Far East. At another meeting in our office, with a group of officials from the PRC Embassy in Washington, there was one particularly distinguished gentleman in uniform, a Military Attache with the rank of Colonel. The conference was concluded without incident, but a week or so later, when Walter returned from a meeting at the Embassy, he was wearing a huge, rather devilish grin. He said he had bumped into the Colonel, who had stopped him to chat. Somewhat uncomfortably, the Colonel had said, in his rather limited English (and this is verbatim, as reported by Walter, with his usual lack of concern for political correctness and a dreadful Charlie Chan impersonation):

“Uh, Miss Brenda. She pretty lady, yes?” Walter was taken aback, and cautiously replied, “Yes, I guess so.”

The Colonel then asked, “She married?”

Walter, still cautiously: “No, not any longer.”

Colonel, eagerly wagging a finger back and forth between Walter and himself: “You fix?”

Now, Walter was an incredibly quick thinker, and realized that Chinese culture would require certain social niceties in these circumstances, so he replied, “Oh, no, I can’t do that. First of all, I am not a matchmaker; and second, that is not how we do things in this country. If you want to see her again, you will have to call her yourself.” Obviously, he knew that would never be allowed to happen, so once again I had been snatched from the jaws of a potentially awkward situation.

*. *. *

I don’t know what it was those two gentlemen saw in me. I was, I guess, not totally unattractive, but certainly no raving beauty. Whatever it was, I was very flattered, and had another couple of great stories to bring home to my family.

Life with Walter could be frustrating, exhausting, and sometimes infuriating; but it was never, ever dull.

Just sayin’ . . .

Brendochka
9/29/26