Having a wonderful time reminiscing about all my past travel (and other) adventures. Hope you’ll share them with me in my blog, “All Roads Led to Russia.”
In real news — the Trump-Putin match — the first round, based on currently available information, appears to be . . .
A TIE.
Following his much-anticipated, two-hour telephone meeting with Vladimir Putin, Trump announced:
“Russia and Ukraine will immediately start negotiations toward a Ceasefire and, more importantly, an END to the War. The conditions for that will be negotiated between the two parties, as it can only be, because they know details of a negotiation that nobody else would be aware of.” [Kit Mahere and Donald Judd, CNN, May 19, 2025.]
Saying that the “tone and spirit of the conversation were excellent,” he added in his post on Truth Social:
“Russia wants to do largescale TRADE with the United States when this catastrophic ‘bloodbath’ is over, and I agree. There is a tremendous opportunity for Russia to create massive amounts of jobs and wealth. Its potential is UNLIMITED.” He also said that Ukraine “can be a great beneficiary on Trade.” [Id.]
While at first face this would appear to be a win for Trump, merely by reason of Putin’s agreeing to undertake direct negotiations with Ukraine (though not specifically with President Zelensky), it only takes a reading of that last paragraph to see that both individuals — Donald Trump and Vladimir Putin — have worked out a means of getting exactly what most benefits them.
Trump, of course, claims bragging rights as the Great Negotiator: the only person in the world able to bring about the desired result.
Putin wins more time . . . time to stretch out the “negotiations” as long as he desires, without having agreed to an immediate ceasefire. His remarks to Russian media following the call indicated that it was “very substantive and quite frank,” and that “Moscow would prepare a memorandum with pre-conditions for a ceasefire.” [RFE/RL, May 19, 2025.]
And together they have opened the door to “TRADE” . . . which in turn implies a lifting of sanctions against Russia, and monetary benefit to both countries.
*. *. *
In short, while the call was certainly worth the long-distance roaming charges, I will hold off on any celebrations until we see what Putin’s “pre-conditions for a ceasefire” turn out to be. If it’s more of the same-old-same-old, then we’re back to square one. But if there are genuine offers of compromise . . . well, then — as Trump said:
Remember those halcyon days of childhood and elementary school, when the seemingly endless hours of reading, writing and arithmetic were interrupted by a 15-minute break for fresh air and exercise known as “recess”?
I recall games of tag, climbing on the jungle gym, playing kickball . . . and the occasional argument erupting between friends. They rarely involved physical combat; instead, name-calling was the favored weapon. And those names could really hurt.
It might start out with something like, “You can’t be on our team because you’re a lousy player.” At which point, the offended child — knowing he wasn’t much of an athlete but being possessed of a superior vocabulary — would summon up the ultimate retort:
“Oh, yeah? Well, you’re a big, fat, ugly, smelly, stupid jerk . . . and you wet your pants!”
And they wouldn’t speak to each other for a day or two, by which time all would be forgotten and forgiven. No one was scarred for life, and I’m reasonably certain most of us outgrew our childish impulses.
But some kids didn’t. Occasionally, we see the bullied become bullies, with an occasional sociopath thrown in for good measure.
And speaking of bullies . . .
You know him; everyone knows him. He is the Bully-in-Chief; the guy who likes nothing better than to have people kowtowing to him, fearing retribution if they step out of line. And if someone dares to insult him, or even disagree with him on even the most trivial subject, he immediately regresses to become again that kid in the playground; summons up his vast vocabulary of insults; and lets loose . . . only now, he shouts his wrath, not just to the kids on the playground, but to the entire world on social media.
And this week’s victims? None other than the multi-talented Taylor Swift and Bruce Springsteen, neither of whom needs an introduction.
Swift’s sin was publicly endorsing Kamala Harris for president last year. Trump responded at the time — oh, so maturely — “I hate Taylor Swift.”
Wow! That took a lot of thought. And now, months later, he has brought her name up again, since it’s obviously been eating away at the lining of his intestines ever since. His most recent comment, written on social media on Friday, was:
“Has anyone noticed that, since I said ‘I HATE TAYLOR SWIFT,’ she’s no longer ‘HOT?’” [JD Knapp, The Wrap, May 16, 2025.]
Sorry, but no . . . I hadn’t noticed.
The Very “Hot” Taylor Swift
And I wonder what a psychologist would have to say about his frequent use of all upper-case letters. Those, and his bold-Sharpie, mile-high signature. But I digress.
As for Springsteen, he had the audacity to say, during the start of his current European tour, that he considered the Trump administration to be “corrupt, incompetent and treasonous”:
“They are persecuting people for using their right to free speech and voicing their dissent. This is happening now. In America, the richest men are taking satisfaction in abandoning the world’s poorest children to sickness and death. In my country, they’re taking sadistic pleasure in the pain that they inflict on loyal American workers. They’re rolling back historic civil rights legislation that led to a more just and moral society. They’re abandoning our great allies and siding with dictators against those struggling for their freedom.” [Id.]
And The Boss continued:
“The mighty E Street Band is here tonight to call upon the righteous power of art, of music, of rock ‘n’ roll in dangerous times. In my home, the America I love, the America I’ve written about, that has been a beacon of hope and liberty for 250 years, is currently in the hands of a corrupt, incompetent and treasonous administration.
“Tonight, we ask all who believe in democracy and the best of our American experiment to rise with us, raise your voices against authoritarianism and let freedom ring!” [Parul Sharma, Irish Star, May 19, 2025.]
Strong words, indeed . . . but not untrue, and therefore not slanderous. They represent the opinion and the sincere feelings of a loyal, honest, patriotic American — and they contain echoes of the 1960s, when non-violent protests had meaning and effect.
And here is where Trump was at his finest, displaying his literary eloquence, his astonishing self-control, and his uncanny ability to stay on-topic. Again utilizing his very own Truth Social outlet, he offered this to his latest target:
“I see that Highly Overrated Bruce Springsteen goes to a Foreign Country to speak badly about the President of the United States. Never liked him, never liked his music or his Radical Left Politics and, importantly, he’s not a talented guy — just a pushy, obnoxious JERK, who fervently supported Crooked Joe Biden, a mentally incompetent FOOL, and our WORST EVER President, who came close to destroying our Country.
“If I wasn’t elected, it would have been GONE by now! Sleepy Joe didn’t have a clue as to what he was doing, but Springsteen is ‘dumb as a rock’ and couldn’t see what was going on, or could he (which is even worse!)? This dried out ‘prune’ of a rocker (his skin is all atrophied!) ought to KEEP HIS MOUTH SHUT until he gets back into the Country, that’s just ‘standard fare.’ Then we’ll all see how it goes for him!” [The Wrap, op.cit.]
*. *. *
I am, for once, rendered speechless. I do have one question, however:
Did those last two sentences sound like a threat to anyone else?
It was just yesterday — Saturday, May 17th — when Donald Trump announced that he and Vladimir Putin were scheduled to speak by phone on Monday, May 19th, at 10:00 a.m. EST (4:00 p.m. CET):
“The subject of the call will be … stopping the ‘bloodbath’ that is killing, on average, more than 5,000 Russian and Ukrainian soldiers a week, and trade. Hopefully it will be a productive day, a cease-fire will take place, and this very violent war, a war that should never have happened, will end.” [RFE/RL’s Ukrainian Service, May 17, 2025.]
That’s what he said.
And what did Vladimir Putin say in response? Well . . . nothing. Not immediately.
Instead, he launched Russia’s biggest drone attack against Ukraine since the beginning of the war more than three years ago. Several aeas were hit, including the Donetsk and Dnipropetrovsk regions in the east, and the capital city of Kyiv, where one woman was killed and at least three others injured, including a four-year-old child.
Kyiv, Ukraine – May 18, 2025
On the same day, Putin — through his spokesman, Dmitry Peskov — finally spoke . . . but not about the upcoming conference call with Trump. Instead, he said that Putin might meet with Ukraine’s President Zelensky, but only if “certain agreements” were reached. Without specifying what those agreements would entail, Peskov went on to say that such a meeting would only be possible if the two sides were to “achieve certain results in the form of agreements.”
He then added: “At the same time, when signing documents that the delegations are to agree upon, the main and fundamental thing for us remains who exactly will sign these documents from the Ukrainian side.” [Dmitry Antonov and Mark Trevelyan, Reuters, May 17, 2025.]
And there it is: yet another gigantic monkey wrench thrown into the diplomatic machinery. In addition to his hard-and-fast demands that Ukraine sacrifice its territory, its security, and its independence, Putin has thrown down the gauntlet in respect of his allegations that Volodymyr Zelensky is not the legitimate president of Ukraine.
This is nothing new . . . he has brought it up before, insisting that Zelensky’s term ended a year ago and that new elections must be held. He of course ignores the fact that Ukraine has been under martial law throughout the war that he, Putin, started . . . and that Ukraine’s constitution provides that no election may be held during times of martial law.
But Putin wants a new election in Ukraine in order to install someone of his own choosing — someone subservient to him, much like Aleksandr Lukashenko in Belarus. And in addition, he has instituted another delaying tactic by which he can continue to batter the Ukrainian people until (he hopes) they can fight no longer.
Putin’s Peace Initiative
So while the first “he” (Trump, in unity with a coalition of European allies) continues to press for serious negotiations, the second “he” (Putin) stalls, dissembles, promises, breaks promises, and lies his face off in order to attain his ultimate goal: reabsorption of Ukraine into a new, revitalized Soviet Union.
*. *. *
Will the promised phone call take place tomorrow? Only Vladimir Putin can answer that.
On the heels of what should have been the start of serious peace talks between Russia and Ukraine, but instead devolved into a 90-minute farce, it seems appropriate to pay special homage today to the largest group of people presently being held hostage by Vladimir Putin: the people of Ukraine.
They are not in Russian prisons or penal colonies; they are innocent of any wrongdoing; no formal criminal charges have been levied against them. Instead, they are trapped in shelters and basements, living in daily fear that at any moment their lives might be taken from them by the next bomb, missile or drone launched by Russia’s forces.
They are as much hostage to Putin’s diabolical machinations as the dissidents, journalists and others confined in his prisons. Their lives have been uprooted, destroyed . . . never to be fully healed. They have lost loved ones, friends and colleagues; sustained permanent physical and emotional injuries beyond measure; seen their homes demolished; had their children ripped from their arms and taken away to Russian “re-education camps.”
They struggle to survive from day to day, their only hope for any sort of future lying with the leaders of the Western nations who continue to fight on their behalf . . . but with the realization that, even when this war finally does come to an end, life will never, ever be as it once was.
And so, with a heavy heart, I add The People of Ukraine to my list of Putin’s hostages, with a prayer that Europe’s Coalition of the Willing, together with the United States, will not give up the fight until they have succeeded in overcoming Putin’s outrageous demands and won a just and lasting peace for the sovereign nation of Ukraine.
*. *. *
And, as always, we honor those hostages still in the prisons and penal colonies, also awaiting their day of justice and freedom:
The People of Ukraine The Azov 12 David Barnes Ales Bialiatski (in Belarus) Gordon Black Andrei Chapiuk (in Belarus) Antonina Favorskaya Konstantin Gabov Robert Gilman Stephen James Hubbard Sergey Karelin Ihar Karney (in Belarus) on Vadim Kobzev Darya Kozyreva Artyom Kriger Uladzimir Labkovich (in Belarus) Michael Travis Leake Aleksei Liptser Ihar Losik (in Belarus) Mikita Losik (in Belarus) Daniel Martindale Farid Mehralizada (in Azerbaijan) Nika Novak Marfa Rabkova (in Belarus) Igor Sergunin Dmitry Shatresov Robert Shonov Eugene Spector Valiantsin Stafanovic (in Belarus) Siarhei Tsikhanouski (in Belarus) Laurent Vinatier Robert Romanov Woodland Vladislav Yesypenko (in Crimea) Yuras Zyankovich (in Belarus)
In case anyone had any doubts as to Vladimir Putin’s intentions with regard to ending his war of attrition against Ukraine, this should help to clarify things for you:
This is the wreckage of the passenger minibus struck by a Russian Lancet drone at 06:17 local time (03:17 GMT) today — the day following the meeting at Istanbul, Turkiye, when an attempt at negotiating a peace agreement between Russia and Ukraine . . . or, at the very least, a 30-day ceasefire to allow for serious negotiations . . . failed miserably after just 90 minutes.
But, as is now well known, Vladimir Putin declined to show up for the meetings, sending instead a low-level delegation that obviously had no authority to negotiate anything beyond an exchange of prisoners. And while his dog-and-pony show was taking place in Istanbul, he was in the Kremlin, busily authorizing further attacks . . . this one killing nine and injuring four other civilians on their way to the city of Sumy in a clearly non-military vehicle.
Russian state media reported that their forces had struck a “military staging area” in the Sumy province. [Jaroslav Lukiv, BBC News, May 17, 2025.]
Right.
*. *. *
A day earlier, following a four-day state visit to the Middle East, Donald Trump told reporters that “nothing’s going to happen [regarding Ukraine] until Putin and I get together. He wasn’t going if I wasn’t there and I don’t believe anything’s going to happen, whether you like it or not, until he and I get together.” [Id.]
Those words — coming on the heels of three days of back-and-forth between Trump and Putin as to whether either or both of them would even bother to show up in Istanbul if the other one wasn’t coming — sound very much like a self-fulfilling prophecy.
And now, Trump has announced that he will speak with Putin by phone on Monday, May 19th, at 10:00 a.m. EST (4:00 p.m. CET), followed by a call with Zelensky and a group call with Zelensky and “various members of NATO.” In a post on his Truth Social network, he said:
“The subjects of the call will be … stopping the ‘bloodbath’ that is killing, on average, more than 5,000 Russian and Ukrainian soldiers a week, and trade. Hopefully it will be a productive day, a cease-fire will take place, and this very violent war, a war that should never have happened, will end.” [RFE/RL’s Ukrainian Service, May 17, 2025.]
Well, that would certainly be the best-case scenario. It’s also the one Trump has been promising the world since he began his presidential campaign.
*. *. *
In the meantime, Yuriy Zarko, chief administrator of the town of Bilopillya, Ukraine, where nine people lay dead among the wreckage of a blue minibus, had this to say:
“This day will become Black Saturday in the history of our town.”
And the citizens of Sumy continue to flee in anticipation of further attacks.
*. *. *
Meanwhile, European leaders continue to discuss measures to be taken to force Putin’s hand; they understand all too well that his word has about as much value as a piece of lint.
Hopefully, by Monday morning, Donald Trump will also have caught on to the truth.
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe: All mimsy were the borogroves, And the mome raths outgrabe.
“Beware the Jabberwock, my son! The jaws that bite, the claws that catch! Beware the Jubjub bird, and shun The frumious Bandersnatch!”
– Lewis Carroll, Jabberwocky
*. *. *
Lewis Carroll penned those intentionally indecipherable words around 1855 — some say, while in the midst of a hallucinogenic experience, either drug- or migraine-induced — as part of his immortal classic, Alice In Wonderland. The poem’s title, Jabberwocky, has long since found its way into English-language dictionaries as a synonym for double-talk, drivel, gibberish, jabber, nonsense, mumbo-jumbo, and the like.
And I would like to add a definition to the list: “Trump-talk.”
Trump-talk is not just Donald Trump’s inability to string more than three words together to form a coherent sentence; it is also the uncanny ability of his team of Wonderland Washingtonians to twist perfectly good groups of words into combinations that are the total opposite of anything resembling fact.
And coming from the man who claims to be the leader of the free world, it is both alarming and — on the world stage — embarrassing as hell. Such as, when he referred to the African nation of Namibia as “Nambia,” likely confusing it with the nearby nation of Zambia. And I shudder to think of what he’d do with Nigeria and Niger . . . or whether he even knows they’re two separate countries. (Or, for that matter, how Niger is actually pronounced.)
But though we may make fun of the malapropisms and the utter absurdities emanating from the mouth of a man who spent the last four years denigrating his predecessor for every stumble and slip-up, they’re not always amusing. In fact, they can be downright dangerous.
For example, there was the stunning comment he made during his first administration, following his now-infamous Helsinki summit with Vladimir Putin in 2018. Despite the dire warnings from U.S. intelligence sources, from Congress, and from his advisers concerning Russian interference in U.S. elections, he said the following:
“My people came to me. Dan Coats [then U.S. Director of National Intelligence] came to me, and some others. They said they think it’s Russia. I have President Putin. I don’t see any reason why it would be.”
I wondered at the time whether he meant to say “why it wouldn’t be,” because — like the rest of the country — I didn’t want to believe he could be that gullible. But whether it was inadvertent or intentional, that one word — “would” instead of “wouldn’t” — started a firestorm of accusations against Trump: accusations of collusion, and even mentions of treason.
And it was the biggest, bestest gift he could have given Putin, all tied up in a big red bow.
*. *. *
What made me think of all this . . . beginning with the Jabberwocky . . . was Trump’s comment to the press on his way back to Washington yesterday aboard Air Force One, when they asked about the failure of the Russia-Ukraine talks at Istanbul that day. On the basis of his earlier statements that nothing was likely to be accomplished until he and Putin sat down together, he said that he might call Putin soon, adding:
“He and I will meet, and I think we’ll solve it or maybe not.” [RFE/RL, May 16, 2025.]
“ . . . I think we’ll solve it or maybe not” ??!!!
Now, isn’t that just the kind of decisive, clear-headed thinking we need from our leaders?
*. *. *
Beware the Jabberwock, my friends. Beware the Jabberwock.
The Frumious Bandersnatch, the Jabberwock, and the Jubjub Bird
Oh, well . . . it’s only another three years and eight months. But who’s counting?
There was a glimmer of hope last weekend, when Vladimir Putin suggested a meeting in Istanbul on May 15th. Initially, Volodymyr Zelensky insisted there first be a formal commitment to a 30-day ceasefire; but, at Donald Trump’s insistence, Zelensky agreed to a meeting without a prior ceasefire . . . but on condition that Putin personally come to the table.
And then the days of suspense, while the world hoped that this might be the beginning of the end of the biggest military conflict Europe has seen since World War II. Would Putin show up, or was this just another stall, asserting his control over the negotiations?
Until finally — on the last day before the scheduled meeting, when Zelensky was already en route from Kyiv to Istanbul — the Kremlin made its long-awaited announcement: Moscow would be sending to Turkiye a delegation of eight lower-level “negotiators and experts.” Absent from the list was one name: Vladimir Putin.
The Russian Delegation
We should have known; and somewhere, deep down inside, we did. He never intended to sit down with Zelensky, in Istanbul or anywhere else in the world. He does not want to end this war on any terms but his own; and as long as he can hold out against the sanctions imposed on his country by the Western nations . . . as long as he has countries like China, and India, and North Korea, and Iran to pick up the slack in trade and military support . . . he doesn’t have to end it.
It took just 90 minutes to hammer out an agreement to exchange 1,000 prisoners of war on each side “in the near future,” and to determine that the two sides are still so far apart on the remaining issues — primarily, a meaningful ceasefire, territorial rights, and the return of Ukraine’s kidnapped children — that there was no possibility of any progress being made. [RFE/RL, May 16, 2025.]
In fact, an unnamed Ukrainian source advised Reuters that the Russian delegation made further demands that were “nonstarters . . . detached from reality and [that] go far beyond anything that was previously discussed.” [Id.]
Another source quoted by AFP said that one such demand was “for Ukraine to withdraw forces from large parts of Ukrainian territory it controls in order for a cease-fire to begin” — an apparent reference to the four regions of Donetsk, Luhansk, Zaporizhzhya and Kherson, partially occupied, and wrongfully claimed, by Russia. [Id.]
The Ukrainian Delegation
Following a summit meeting being held on the same day in Tirana, Albania, that included Ukrainian President Zelensky, British Prime Minister Keir Starmer, Polish Prime Minister Donald Tusk, French President Emmanuel Macron, and German Chancellor Friedrich Merz — and included a phone call with Donald Trump — a joint statement was issued by Prime Minister Starmer saying that “The Russian position is clearly unacceptable, and not for the first time.” He added that “ . . . we are now closely aligning and coordinating our responses and will continue to do so.” [Id.]
The Western Coalition
After the call with Trump, Zelensky issued the following statement on social media:
“Ukraine is ready to take the fastest possible steps to bring real peace, and it is important that the world holds a strong stance. Our position [is that] if the Russians reject a full and unconditional cease-fire and an end to killings, tough sanctions must follow. Pressure on Russia must be maintained until Russia is ready to end the war.” [Id.]
But, despite all of the foregoing, the best the Russians could come up with was a statement from the leader of their delegation, presidential aide Vladimir Medinsky, that Moscow was “satisfied with the result [on the whole and] ready to continue contacts.” He said his delegation had “taken note” of Ukraine’s request for direct talks between Zelensky and Putin . . . but did not indicate what the odds were of such talks actually taking place.
Instead, he said they had agreed that “each side will present its vision of a possible future cease-fire and spell it out in detail. After such a vision has been presented, we believe it would be appropriate, as also agreed, to continue our negotiations.” [Id.]
To which, Zelensky had this to say:
“This week we had a real chance to take important steps toward ending this war. If only Putin had not been afraid to come to Turkey.” [Id.]
*. *. *
On one point, I’m afraid I have to disagree with President Zelensky. Putin was not afraid to show up; he never intended to. It’s all part of his game plan, and he’s more than happy to play the long game in order to achieve his goal of total victory.
The offering of a meeting in Istanbul was a ploy . . . “full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.” [Shakespeare, Macbeth.]
And I have to wonder: How many times will the West be played for the fool before we finally call Putin’s bluff?
They say that imitation is the sincerest form of flattery. And they — whoever they are — also say that flattery will get you anywhere. If both of those adages are correct, then Argentina’s President Javier Milei just hit the jackpot.
Argentinian President Javier Milei
Looking like a cross between Johnny Cash and a somewhat faded Elvis Presley, Milei announced at a rally on Wednesday that he has issued a decree curbing immigration to Argentina, a country with a long history of openness to immigrants . . . a move that has drawn widespread criticism and a comparison to America’s very own Donald Trump.
But Milei seems to consider those criticisms in a favorable light, judging from the comment of presidential spokesman Manuel Adorni, who said it is “time to honor our history and make Argentina great again.” [CNN World, May 15, 2025.]
Now, where have we heard that before?
Trump must be feeling really special about now. Not only has he been given the uber-royal treatment in Saudi Arabia, Qatar and Dubai . . . he also has a friend in South America who seems to be mimicking his every move: instituting an austerity program resembling DOGE’s slash-and-burn method of cutting government spending; raging against the “woke” left; pulling out of the World Health Organization after the U.S. announced its exit; threatening to quit the Paris climate accord after Trump did; outlawing gender change treatments for minors; and promoting a cryptocurrency token much like the $Trump coin. [CBS News, April 5, 2025.]
I can hear Trump now, humming softly to himself the old nursery rhyme: “I have a little shadow that goes in and out with me, but what can be the use of him is more than I can see.”
Clearly, Milei is seeking assistance from the U.S.; what Trump might gain from the relationship is less obvious. But I’m sure he has something in mind.
Perhaps he’s searching for a 52nd state . . . a very large one.
In any event, he might do well to remember another old saying — one of my grandmother’s favorites: You are judged by the company you keep.
… on May 15, 1988, Soviet troops began their withdrawal from Afghanistan following a more than eight-year occupation.
The Soviet Withdrawal
The human and economic cost to the Soviet Union had proven unsustainable, in no small part due to the intervention of America’s CIA, who helped to support the Afghan Mujahideen faction, with financing authorized by the U.S. Congress. ** Finally, Russian leader Mikhail Gorbachev made the decision to end the war that Westerners were referring to as “Russia’s Vietnam.”
** For the gripping story of the involvement of U.S. Congressman Charlie Wilson and CIA operative Gust Avrakotos in engineering America’s continued support for Afghanistan, I recommend George Crile’s book, “Charlie Wilson’s War.” (The Tom Hanks film is also well worth watching — but then, I think anything Tom Hanks does is superb. Just sayin’...)
*. *. *
Some two years later, that defeat was still an extremely sore subject for the Soviet government . . . and I unexpectedly found myself in the happy circumstance of being able to rub it in a little.
It was April of 1990, and I was in London with a team from our Washington law firm, co-sponsoring a conference on doing business in the Soviet Union and Eastern Europe. Included among the honored speakers was one Dmitry (last name irrelevant), who was a highly-placed official with the USSR Ministry of Foreign Affairs.
Let me give you a brief description of Dmitry. He was well into his 60s, white-haired, with a circumference around the waist that nearly equaled his height, and very full of himself. When he was introduced to me as the member of our team who spoke Russian, he was sure he had found his companion for the week. I guess he also liked redheads.
Fat chance, Dmitry! I spent the next four days trying to avoid him, with a fair amount of success, until the end-of-conference cocktail party at the hotel where the conference had been held and where we had all been housed.
Dmitry had been hitting the sauce pretty hard, and was trying to talk me into accompanying him to a reception being given by the Soviet Ambassador at their London embassy, to which I had not been invited. I knew that would have been a major breach of protocol, and kept changing the subject. At one point, Dmitry said something snide about the U.S. debacle in Vietnam, which I found offensive coming from him. So I decided I’d had enough of being diplomatic, and said:
“I know that Vietnam was not our finest hour — sort of like Afghanistan for you.”
At which point, time seemed to stop. Dmitry didn’t move; he didn’t blink, he didn’t swallow, he didn’t draw a breath . . . he simply turned an alarming shade of red from the neck up. And when he finally gathered his wits about him, he straightened up, inhaled deeply, and bellowed:
“That is a strictly internal matter!”
Being a person of considerable authority back in Moscow, he most likely expected me to recoil in fear. But Dmitry knew nothing about American women in general, or me in particular. Instead of backing off, I took a couple of steps toward him, pulled myself up to my full five feet, two and a half inches in height, looked him square in the eyes, and said,
“Oh, really? Well, tell that to the Afghanis!”
Do you know those times when you can’t think of the perfect comeback until it’s too late, and you find yourself thinking “I should have said”? Well, this wasn’t one of those times; it was, instead, that rare instance of saying just the right thing, and being able to turn on my heel and walk away. And I cannot describe to you how good that felt.
*. *. *
Mercifully, I never saw Dmitry again. But I heard, from a colleague who had attended the Soviet Ambassador’s reception, that he had continued drinking into the evening, and completely disgraced himself. I’m only sorry I wasn’t there to see it.
I don’t know what happened to Dmitry after that trip to London, or if he’s even still alive . . . though I sometimes wonder if he remembered that evening as clearly as I still do. Considering the condition he was in, I somehow doubt it.
The Blog About Everything … and Sometimes Nothing 