It’s Christmas week — in fact, it’s the month of happy holidays — and the news headlines have been so grim (earthquake in China, volcano eruption in Iceland, floods up and down the U.S. east coast, you name it), that I’ve had to go searching for something cheerful to write about. And I can’t find it. Russia is still trying to destroy and capture Ukraine; Israel and Hamas are still trying to destroy each other; and Donald Trump is still trying to convince the world he’s presidential material.

So in desperation I’ve turned to CNN’s “Style” and “Entertainment” sections. And even there I found a few items about people who have sadly passed away just before ushering in 2024, some films that have bombed, and one woman whose intestines nearly exploded (but happily, she’s recovering nicely).

I did manage to pick out a few headlines that sounded interesting, so I thought I’d toss them at you for your reactions. Maybe they’ll induce a chuckle or two out of someone.

First, from CNN Style, December 18th:

1) The Meaning Behind Pantone’s Color of the Year 2024. I’ve been holding my breath all year for this unveiling, as I’m sure you have. And at last, here it is: it’s “Peach Fuzz” — a soft color, chosen because “it conjures peace and serenity.” And Heaven knows, we all need a little of that. So everyone run out and buy some clothes in pale peach, and redecorate at least one room in a dreamy pastel color brought back from the 1960s. And be prepared to do it all over again next year, in a color that will undoubtedly conjure chaos and mayhem.

2) Italian Designers Are Using Fruit Peel To Make Furniture. I didn’t even bother to read this one. I’m all for recycling, but this just conjured an image of my pet otter nibbling at the furniture . . . while I’m sitting on it.

3) A Space For Humans and Pigeons To Share Is Among the Highlights of Dubai Design Week. Okay, this one requires explanation. First, it’s not a residence; it’s a shade shelter, inspired by “the historical significance of pigeon towers in the Arabian Peninsula, where buildings that often featured beautiful arches and detailed engravings were built to protect pigeons during harsh weather and collect their feces for use as fertilizer, as well as showcasing the wealth of the tower’s owner. [The new design] features pigeon nests at the top of the oblong structure, while three arched entrances at the bottom welcome human visitors. The sections for humans and pigeons are separated, and bird feces collected from the top section will be used as fertilizer for plants in Dubai’s Design District.” Well, that’s a relief! But I once had two pigeons take shelter for the winter in a corner of my balcony where I had stored my outdoor furniture under a tarp. When I found them in the spring, they were decidedly dead, frozen solid, and their poop — also frozen — was scooped up, by me, to become garbage, not fertilizer. I want nothing more to do with pigeons, thank you.

4) People Are Making Furniture Out of Cardboard. Furniture seems to be a big item this year. But seriously, haven’t homeless people been doing this for eons? I think they should be given credit — and a share of the profits — for having started the trend.

5) A Guitar Maker Finds Music in Mushrooms. Didn’t read this one either; methinks this fellow has mistaken the magic mushrooms of his happy hippy days for musical mushrooms in his golden years. Peace out, friend.

6) Gen-Z Is Already Worried About Looking Old. Well, welcome to my world, you spoiled little brats. I’ve got a news flash for you: It doesn’t make a damn bit of difference how much healthy food you eat, how much you exercise, or how much plastic surgery you have. You’re going to get old eventually, unless you die young. Take your pick.

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I’m sorry to say, I found even less inspiration in the Entertainment section, but here are a couple of items of some minor interest:

1) Eddie Murphy Is Back As Axel Foley In Beverly Hills Cop 4. No disrespect, Eddie, but aren’t you and the rest of the regular cast a little slower than you were 30 years ago, when No. 3 was released? Though if Indiana Jones can keep going, I guess Axel Foley can too. Good luck to you.

2) Taylor Swift and Her Dad Cheer On Travis Kelce At Chiefs Game. Let’s move on . . . there’s nothing new here. I just included it because no column on entertainment would be complete without you-know-who.

3) Why Cher Says She Doesn’t Want To Be In the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame. Honestly, I don’t care one way or the other. But here she is . . .

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Well, I tried; I can’t help it if the good news isn’t all that great. It’s still better than the daily gloom-and-doom . . . but not much.

Happy holidays anyway,
Brendochka
12/19/23