Have we been ghosted?

Russia has been in the news a lot lately — way too much, actually — and we really shouldn’t be surprised if we’re left with more questions than answers from that land of mystery. Included on that list of questions are a few about some people, and one very large piece of hardware, that appeared in the news . . . and then seemed to vanish. They weren’t wearing white sheets, but their quick entry onto, and exit from, the news scene makes me wonder if we haven’t indeed been ghosted.

First, of course, would be the infamous Yevgeny Prigozhin, who keeps popping in and out of sight. “There he is!” “Where? I don’t see him.” “Oh, never mind — he’s gone now.” And throughout all the mystery surrounding his failed attempt to overthrow the Russian military (or whatever the hell he was trying to do), the question inevitably arose: “In his absence, who’s going to take over as head of the Wagner Group?” And a name was put forward: that of one Andrei Troshev, a former Russian Army artillery colonel, mentioned by Vladimir Putin himself to The Telegraph back in July.

But that’s it. He showed up, and he faded into the background again. What happened? Is he now out of the running? Or is he just waiting in the shadows until someone decides what to do with Prigozhin? As always when dealing with Russia, we can only wait and see if and when these two spooks manifest themselves again.

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Ghost #3: This one should be harder to hide. It’s a Russian warship that made an appearance on July 12th in the harbor at Havana, Cuba. The story was that she and her crew were there for a four-day “visit,” and that Cuban citizens were even going to be allowed aboard. Then what? Again, nothing. No news reports, no official (or unofficial) statements, no ship. Poof! Can we help being a little bit curious?

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Ghost #4: Paul Whelan is a former U.S. Marine with multiple citizenships (U.S., U.K., Canada and Ireland) and a rather complex personal and professional background. In December of 2018, he was arrested in Moscow on charges of spying for the United States, on the basis of evidence allegedly found on his person — charges that he has consistently denied. The U.S. Government has made attempts to include him in prisoner exchanges over the past few years, but Russia has so far refused to release him. As with the other prisoners in Russia’s maximum-security prisons, there has been little or no access to him for family or U.S. officials, and no mention of his name except at the time of another failed exchange attempt.

Ghost #5: And most recently, there is Evan Gershkovich, American-born journalist for the Wall Street Journal, whose parents fled the Soviet Union and emigrated to the United States in 1979. While on assignment in Russia in March of this year, he was arrested on charges of espionage — vehemently denied — and has been imprisoned since that time. His arrest made headlines for some time, but now . . . there is only silence.

But in the cases of Ghosts 4 and 5, I believe there may be good reason for the long periods of silence. It is well known that behind-the-scenes efforts have been underway to resolve their cases; and revealing the details of those efforts could be counter-productive, perhaps even a dangerous breach of national security. So, in these instances, let us continue to hope for the best, as we . . .

. . . switch gears, and look at a few people that I’m actually thrilled to note are appearing less and less frequently in the headlines.

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I have to begin with every single member of the Kardashian-Jenner family. As far as I know, they are alive and kicking, and I certainly do not wish them any bad luck. But I am so glad to be seeing less of them in the news, and hope for their continued absence. They have made more than enough money to live in luxury for the rest of their lives. So please, all of you Kardashians . . . take your inflated egos (and various other inflated body parts) and enjoy a nice, long retirement, out of the public eye. Bye-bye.

Then there’s Sarah Palin, who single-handedly did more to lose the 2008 election for John McCain than anything he might ever have said or done himself. Alaska is a beautiful state. Stay there, Sarah, with your “Bridge to Nowhere” and the view of Russia from your front porch. Get a job — any job not in the political arena. And preferably something you’re actually qualified for.

And there are some other celebrities who have had their 15 minutes of fame (and earned small fortunes in the process), but whose “talent” has always escaped me. Remember “Octomom,” whose one claim to fame was her ability to procreate? And the same for that whole bizarre Duggar clan. Or that rude, nasty little “Honey Boo Boo”? (I’d rather confront the Honey Badger!) What were we thinking when we tuned in to watch them?!!

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So here’s what I’d like to have happen: I would wish for all those so-called celebrities to be wiped from my memory. And then I’d wish for the right people to wake up and remember the ones who deserve our attention, starting with those people wasting away in Russian prisons.

And finally, I’d really like to know what happened to that Russian warship. My theory is that it’s on a round-the-world cruise with just one famous passenger, Yevgeny Prigozhin, standing on the bridge and laughing his ass off. It is, indeed, a mad, mad, mad, mad world.

Just sayin’ . . .

Brendochka
8/12/23