If all y’all Republicans down there in Texas are so determined to continue with your redistricting, why not go whole hog, and gerrymander your cheatin’ selves straight back to your roots?

For those of you who skipped history class, here’s your chance to catch up. From 1821 to 1836, after Mexico gained its independence from Spain (that’s in Europe), Texas was part of Mexico. I know that’s a surprise, but it’s true.

Anyway, in 1836, the folks in Texas decided to declare their independence, and they formed the Republic of Texas. But then the United States decided it wanted Texas for itself — even before they knew about all the oil buried there — and they annexed it in 1845. Mexico and the United States went to war in 1846, and by the time it was over in 1848, Texas, and a whole lot more territory, had become part of the United States.

That’s a very simplified version of the history of your great state, but I wanted to be sure y’all understood that Texas started out in Mexico, and that all y’all Texans are really the sons and daughters of Mexican immigrants to the United States.

So I’m thinkin’ that maybe, if y’all ain’t happy with the way things are, or you’re not willin’ to do things accordin’ to our laws, you might want to consider goin’ back to Mexico and lettin’ us get on with the important things in our lives.

As for your oil, I’m sure we can make up the difference from places like Oklahoma and Alaska, and that can be our gift to Mexico for takin’ you back.

Happy trails, y’all.

Just sayin’ . . .

Brendochka
8/5/25

P.S. Just one more thing: To all the Texas Democrats who left the state this week to prevent a vote on an illegal redistricting measure . . . good work. I’m sure we can find jobs for you in the 49 remaining states.