We’ve all heard of the five stages of grief. These are not they. These are, rather, what I call the Nine Steps to Triumph, or The Gospel According To Vladimir Putin.

First, you Deploy . . . a gradually increasing number of troops on the Russia-Ukraine border, calling it a “Special Military Operation” — as though it were some sort of routine exercise.

Second, you Deny . . . when the world accuses you of planning an invasion of Ukraine, stating unequivocally that you have no intention of invading anyone.

Third, in the face of those accusations, you Dissemble . . . calling Ukraine “historically Russian lands,” and claiming that there is “no historical basis [for the] idea of Ukrainian people as a nation separate from the Russians.” You even go so far as to aver that Ukraine never had “real statehood,” and that the creation of modern Ukraine was a mistake. [Vladimir Putin, “On the Historical Unity of Russians and Ukrainians,” July 12, 2021.]

Fourth, you Declare . . . in this case, war . . . against the sovereign nation of Ukraine. Only you still call it your “Special Military Operation” — as though that’s going to fool anyone when the tanks begin rolling across the border and people start dying.

Fifth, you Disclaim any and all accusations of aggression, offering a fairy-tale version of events to depict yourself as the savior of the Ukrainian people.

Sixth, you Denounce the legally-elected President of Ukraine, Volodymyr Zelensky — who happens to be Jewish — as a Nazi. That one isn’t even worth dignifying with a response.

Seventh, you Destroy huge swaths of the country you claim to be rescuing, in the process killing and maiming hundreds of thousands of people — both civilians and military . . . including your own Russian soldiers.

Eighth, you Demand that, in order to achieve a peaceful solution to the war that you yourself started, Ukraine will have to hand over to you some 20% of its territory; relinquish the right to any security guarantees; and elect a new president . . . one satisfactory to you.

And finally, when it appears as though you may have been backed into a corner by the rest of the world who really do want to negotiate a just peace, you Delay . . . again blaming Ukraine for wanting to use a proposed ceasefire in order to regroup and rearm . . . all the while continuing to Deny, Dissemble, Disclaim, Denounce and Demand.

The worst part of this whole wretched scenario is that, at least to some extent, it actually works for you. Not that anyone believes a single word that you say; you simply wear them down.

In all likelihood, you will have to compromise on some of the details; but you will end up winning more than Ukraine will be allowed to salvage. And the rest of Europe will continue to tremble, wondering who will be next in your sights.

Which is what you wanted all along . . . isn’t it?

Just sayin’ . . .

Brendochka
3/15/25