Christmas is a time for families and friends, and often total strangers, to come together in harmony and peace. It’s a time for messages of love and good wishes for the coming year.

And this year, it was a time for America to receive the biggest, bestest gift imaginable for the coming year: three additions to the family, whose names are:

Canada,
Panama Canal,
and
Greenland

Yes, those would be strange names for a trio of newborns . . . if we were talking about people. (Though not any stranger than some of Elon Musk’s offspring, but let’s not belabor that subject.)

We are, however, talking about geographical entities. And the incoming American Alienator-In-Chief has decided that the United States needs all three in order to secure our . . . well, I’m not sure exactly what we’re supposed to be securing. But he says we need them, so it must be true.

Accordingly, Canadian Prime Minister Trudeau will hereinafter be known as Governor Trudeau of the State of Canada; the Chinese (who may or may not be in Panama at all) will no longer have control (which they may or may not actually have at all) of the Canal; and the people of Greenland will have to forget their Greenlandic and Danish languages and begin working on their English.

And someone will be busily trying to figure out how to arrange 53 stars on a flag. Good luck with that . . . 53 isn’t divisible by anything.

Wait! I’ve got it! Three rows of 11 and two rows of 10 . . . a total of 53 really, really small stars.

* * * * * * * * * * *
* * * * * * * * * *
* * * * * * * * * * *
* * * * * * * * * *
* * * * * * * * * * *

Okay, that’ll work. Now, if we can only get the people of Canada, Panama and Denmark to agree . . .

Just sayin’ . . .

Brendochka
12/28/24