We each grieve in our own way. Some weep and moan and tear their clothes. Others retreat into some inner place and keep silent. Still others celebrate the life of the deceased with a party. In New Orleans, a loud, jazz-fueled parade is de rigueur.

And Lisa Marie Presley — daughter of Elvis and Priscilla — found her own way of handling her grief in 2020 when her son, Benjamin Keough, died of a shotgun wound at age 27.

She packed him in dry ice and kept him at home for a couple of months until she felt ready to let him go.

Wow! Except for the turquoise hair, he’s lookin’ seriously like his ol’ granddaddy there!

But back to his poor, bereaved momma. Prior to her own death, less than three years after her son’s, Lisa Marie had begun writing her memoirs. She never finished, but did leave behind some recorded notes from which her daughter (and Benjamin’s sister), Riley Keough, was able to finish the book, titled “From Here to the Great Unknown.” And thus, we have the tale of the first eight weeks of young Ben Ben’s afterlife.

Riley tell us that “It was really important for my mom to have ample time to say goodbye to him, the same way she’d done with her dad. And I would go and sit in there with him.” [Lisa Respers France, CNN, October 8, 2024.]

WHAT??!!! They did that to Elvis too? I did not know that. Maybe it was publicized at the time and I just missed it, but . . . well . . . WOW!

Anyway, Lisa Marie kept Ben Ben, as she called him, in “a separate casitas bedroom.” As she explained,

“There is no law in the state of California to bury someone immediately. I found a very empathetic funeral home owner. I told her that having my dad in the house after he died was incredibly helpful because I could go and spend time with him and talk to him. She [the funeral director] said, ‘We’ll bring Ben Ben to you. You can have him there.’” [Id.]

She went on to explain that the designated casitas room had to be kept at 55 degrees, presumably to keep the dry ice from evaporating, and that she felt “fortunate that there was a way that I could still parent him, delay it a bit longer so that I could become okay with laying him to rest.” [Id.]

I don’t know what to say about the “parenting” thing. In fact, I don’t know what to say about any of this.

*. *. *

Well, yes . . . actually, I do.

It’s not my purpose to judge anyone else’s decisions, and certainly not their way of handling difficult situations. If it helped Lisa Marie through what must have been a dreadful first stage of grief, then I’m glad — for her — that she was able to do it.

But on my part . . . well, I’ve buried both my mother and my sister. And the thought of having either of them lying around in a spare room, packed in dry ice, for two months . . . well, I’m sorry, but that’s just a little too Addams Family for me.

Just sayin’ . . .

Brendochka
10/11/24