Most of us are satisfied with living fairly ordinary lives. We strive toward different types and levels of success: a satisfying job that pays a decent living wage; a happy, healthy family; a minimum of bad luck.

Others are more driven to achieve greater levels of “success” — wealth, fame, power. Those are your captains of industry; movie, music and sports stars; world leaders. It’s all a matter of personal choice, unique to each individual according to his or her inborn nature and life experiences.

I feel that the world has enough movers and shakers. In fact, as far as I’m concerned, the Earth is moving and shaking a bit too fast for me ever to try to keep up. But there are those who are never satisfied, always seeking the next best thing, even if it’s not always something monumental.

To me, however, you know you’ve arrived when:

You can — and do — pay $19,000 for a pair of jeans. Now, who would do that? . . . I hear you ask. And I’ll tell you: lots of people with too much money and too much time on their hands. In this case, it was actress Blake Lively who gave in to the impulse. The denim pants were designed by Valentino, and are described as featuring thigh-to-heel cut-outs and hibiscus-shaped embroidery. They’re very cool-looking, actually, and look great on Blake. My thoughts on the price? First, that’s a pretty high profit margin for Valentino. But it’s your money, Blake, and I firmly support your right to spend it any way you choose. I do hope, though, that you at least donated an older garment — say, a $100 pair of Levis — to Salvation Army or Goodwill, so that some family trying to subsist on $19,000 a year can treat their teenage daughter to something special.

Russia bans your foundation from operating on their territory. Congratulations, George and Amal Clooney. You have reached the pinnacle of success in life when you’ve been booted out by Vladimir Putin. I’m sorry the good people of Russia will not benefit from your largesse; but most of your contributions would likely have wound up in the wrong pockets anyway. There are plenty of other places that will welcome your good works.

You have a lifestyle that allows you to wear these kinds of nails. Clearly, these ladies won’t be washing dishes or changing diapers any time soon.

Donald Trump claims you support him. Never mind that you’re the number one music celebrity in the world. Or that you’ve got a great family and a killer boyfriend. Or that you’re a savvy businesswoman worth a cool billion. Those all fade into meaninglessness alongside the fact that Donald Trump thinks you are valuable as propaganda for his campaign of lies. And it doesn’t matter that — like most of what he says — not a word of it is true. You have made it, girl! The Donald likes you!

All I can say is . . . better you than me. He just wants the votes from your fans, anyway.

*. *. *

And in my case, . . .

When your pharmacist calls you by your first name because you now have more ongoing prescriptions than any of their other customers. Then you know you’ve arrived . . . at official old age.

Of course, it’s still better than the alternative.

Just sayin’ . . .

Brendochka
8/21/24