That’s not possible. I mean, it was just Christmas, wasn’t it? And the start of the brand new 2024, when everything was all bright and shiny and going to be better than crappy old 2023? What the hell happened to the last five months?

Well, face it — they’re gone. And things aren’t better, generally speaking. We’re still mired in inflation that has us cutting back on luxuries like . . . groceries. People are dying of thirst in India, while the heat wave in Texas was broken by a 50-degree temperature drop and a deluge of hail. China has decided that if their friend Russia isn’t invited to the Swiss conference on Ukraine, they won’t go either. And the United States has a convicted felon running in the next presidential election. It’s a crazy, whacked-out world, and all the discarded calendar pages don’t seem able to fix it.

But . . .

I have found a silver lining, of sorts, at least for one day. Because it turns out that June 1st is a day for commemorating quite a few cool ideas. So paste a smile over that glum face, and let’s begin with . . .

National Pen Pal Day. Considering that no one under the age of 60 has likely heard of a pen pal, let me explain. It was the precursor of today’s email buddy or social media “friend,” perhaps someone you have never met but enjoy exchanging thoughts and words with. The difference is that we used to write with a pen, on actual paper, and send the letters through the mail in envelopes with postage stamps on them. And we used complete sentences, and mostly correct grammar and spelling. But since no one seems able to write any longer — certainly not in cursive! — forget it. This day should be scrubbed from the calendar.

Global Day of Parents. We already have — in the U.S., at least — Mother’s Day and Father’s Day. But a global recognition of the blood, sweat and tears that go into raising one or more children would be a nice thing. Although there seems to be less real parenting these days than in my childhood, so this one is up for debate. If you’re one of the lucky ones who have great parents — one, two, or more of them, of whatever gender identity — then by all means, count your blessings and celebrate them today.

National Say Something Nice Day. This should be every day, but it seems to be harder and harder for people to do. Maybe it’s our role models: actors, sports stars, musicians, journalists, royalty, and especially world leaders and politicians. What the hell is wrong with everyone? I’m trying to find something nice to say right now, and not having any luck. Screw it.

Dare Day. Okay, here’s one: I dare you to find something nice to say. Right now. Don’t hesitate, don’t overthink it. Just spit it out. Ha! Not so easy, is it?

National Skincare Day. Well, that’s lovely. I’m not sure how much good one day of taking care of your epidermis will do, but maybe it will feel so good it will become a daily habit. In any event, it can’t do any harm, and it could even give you something nice to write to your pen pal about.

And by the way, I do believe June 1st is the official first day of hurricane season, isn’t it? Whoop-de-do for that one! We now have six months of waiting for the next name on the list to head our way.

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Now, if none of those events move you to waves of rapture, there’s always tomorrow, June 2nd, which looks like fun. We have, among others:

National Cancer Survivor’s Day. At last, something to truly celebrate! Seriously.

Leave the Office Early Day. Wait a minute — that’s a Sunday this year. Stiffed again.

American Indian Citizenship Day. Uh . . . weren’t they the original American citizens? That just sounds insulting.

National I Love My Dentist Day. Yeah, sure.

And finally . . .

National Bubba Day. I’m afraid I don’t know a single soul named, or nicknamed, Bubba. But I’m going to spend tomorrow looking for one. It’s a great name. (Do you suppose there’s really a Bubba Gump?)

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So have a terrific weekend, everyone. Pick your favorite celebrations, kick back, and enjoy. And don’t forget to say something nice to your parents. Maybe tell them how good their skin looks.

Just sayin’ . . .

Brendochka
6/1/24