The “what” is unquestionably the worst kind of mischief, while “they” are the mischief-makers: Vladimir Putin, Xi Jinping, Aleksandr Lukashenko, Viktor Orban, and others too numerous to name . . . right down to and including old Beelzebub himself. For surely all of those earthly demons must have had a creator.

As I’ve changed my focus a bit this past week, I’ve been concerned that I might have missed a vital news flash or two. So I tried to catch up today, and found that, first, the world has not come to an end, but sadly, it’s still trying to do just that. Allow me to encapsulate a few of the highlights into one article, so that hopefully I might begin the week fresh tomorrow.

Vladimir Putin: What better place to start than with the man we most love to hate — that master manipulator of facts, destroyer of hard-won freedoms, invader of sovereign nations, ruthless obliterator of countless thousands of lives. This week, he took aim at his own military, beginning a purge of high-ranking officers and officials now accused of corruption. Most noted among these are Vadim Shamarin, Deputy Chief of the General Staff; Deputy Defense Minister Timur Ivanov; and Yury Kuznetsov, head of personnel for the Defense Ministry . . . each charged with some level of bribery. But apparently Mr. Putin’s dictionary offers a different definition of “purge” than my Webster’s Unabridged, because he claims that that is a misnomer; this current rash of arrests is merely part of an ongoing crusade against corruption and financial waste in the military. The fact that it just came to light with the appointment of a brand-new Defense Minister — a civilian economist by the name of Andrey Belousov — is, of course, coincidental.

As is the sudden but not totally unexpected removal of the previous Defense Minister, Sergey Shoigu — a close friend and fishing partner of Putin himself, who had served in his post for a dozen years and now finds himself with a new nameplate: that of Secretary of the Security Council of Russia, seated at the head table in the Kremlin between his old buddy Putin (who is also Chairman of the Security Council) and the Council’s Vice-Chairman, Dmitry Medvedev. Yes, that Medvedev: the two-faced, name-calling, war-mongering, nuclear-waving excuse for a statesman who somehow transitioned from the politically moderate placeholder of the Presidency from 2008 to 2012, into the fire-and-brimstone hell-raiser you see today, without so much as batting an eyelash.

All I can say is: Watch your back, Sergey.

And the former Security Council Secretary, Nikolai Patrushev, who had been keeping that seat warm for the past 16 years . . . what has become of him? Well, for some reason that has yet to be explained, he’s been kicked downstairs to some “vital” job “in charge of transportation.” Wikipedia identifies him currently as “Aide to the President of Russia.” For once, I think even Wiki may have been stumped.

And finally, in one of his rare, unintended moments of dark humor, Vladimir Putin himself — in a visit to another good buddy, Aleksandr Lukashenko, presumptive President of Belarus — questioned whether Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky “has the legitimacy to negotiate on Ukraine’s behalf.” He bases this on the fact that Zelensky’s five-year term of office was to have ended on May 20th . . . completely ignoring the fact that new presidential elections in Ukraine have been suspended while that country is at war. Zelensky is still President. [Jim Heintz, Associated Press, May 24, 2024.]

I just hope Putin doesn’t try to bring up issues of constitutionality, because if any stone-thrower ever lived in a glass Kremlin . . .

*. *. *

But enough about Putin. Now on to . . .

Xi Jinping: Ah, the inscrutable Chinese . . . not so inscrutable this time, but right out there in the open. Somewhat miffed at the nerve of the good folks of Taiwan for having held a presidential election without China’s permission or oversight, and of the new president, Lai Ching-te, for calling on Beijing to “cease its intimidation tactics,” China decided that a “punishment” was in order for these “separatist acts,” and thus launched two days of large-scale military drills surrounding Taiwan.

But, President Xi, wait a second . . . haven’t you overlooked something? Like the fact that Taiwan does not and never did belong to China? You say that it is part of your territory, despite the fact that you have never had control of it. But saying it doesn’t make it so. You could claim territorial rights over Jupiter, but . . . come on! Even you can’t believe your own hype this time. You haven’t been eating Magic Mushrooms, have you?

*. *. *

Viktor Orban: On my one and only visit to Hungary in 1990, that country — along with much of Eastern Europe — was in the throes of casting off the shackles of Soviet communist rule and rewriting its constitution along democratic lines. It was a wonderful, hopeful, joyous time under the leadership of democratically-elected Prime Minister Jozsef Antall, and the people of Hungary were embracing the changes wholeheartedly.

But 34 years on, things have changed. Hungary has been a proud member of NATO since 1999. But the current Prime Minister, Viktor Orban, is an admirer and good friend of Vladimir Putin; and a little thing called the Russian invasion of Ukraine has proven to be something of an inconvenience for Mr. Orban. NATO’s members have been consistently supportive of Ukraine in that country’s defense of its sovereignty. But it seems that the terms of the NATO Treaty are somewhat at odds with Orban’s desire to, shall we say, keep his lips within kissing distance of Putin’s hind end.

So now Viktor Orban is busily trying to find a solution to this political conundrum. He said last week on state radio that:

“Our lawyers and officers are hard at work to see how Hungary can maintain its NATO membership in a way that it wouldn’t have to take part in NATO actions outside NATO territory.” [Sinead Baker, Business Insider, May 24, 2024.] In other words, he wants it both ways.

Who the hell does he think he is . . . Prince Harry?!!

And that, dear readers, is the week that was . . . aside from a few natural disasters and the usual domestic political dust-ups. I, for one, am glad it’s over.

Just sayin’ . . .

Brendochka
5/28/24