My day is totally complete. I didn’t have to search for a topic for today’s blog; this one, like, jumped right off the page and smacked me across my smiling face:

“Kim Kardashian clears up whether she blow dries her jewelry and other rumors.” [Lisa Respers France, CNN, April 23, 2024.]

Oh! My! God! Can you, like, believe it??!!!

I mean, like, Kim actually told such great stuff to Jimmy Kimmel, right there on his show! Stuff like — OMG! — when she was “like seven and eight years old,” she lived next door to Madonna, and would walk her dog after school in exchange for the jewelry she didn’t wear anymore. Madonna’s jewelry — not, like, the dog’s. Jeez!

Wow, she sure started that entrepreneur stuff early. No wonder she’s so rich.

Anyway, one time Madonna gave her, like, a shoe box with a bunch of neon bracelets, and when she wore them to school, “Everyone was like, ‘Oh my God I love your bracelets.’ And we were like, ‘Thanks. Madonna gave them to us.’”

Those were her exact words! How totally awesome is that?!!

And then — I can’t believe it — she told Jimmy Kimmel how she blow dries her jewelry and anything with a zipper before she puts them on because she can’t stand being freezing cold, so she, like, warms all the metal stuff first. Isn’t she the smartest?!!

Oh, and wait — I haven’t told you the best part yet. She, like, washes her feet every night before bed. But she didn’t, like, mention the rest of her body. I wonder when she washes all that? And how does she, like, reach that awesome backside . . . ?

Anyway — and this is totally awesome — she sleeps with her eyes partially open!

Partially? How does she do that? I mean, I tried, and they always, like, closed the rest of the way by themselves when I fell asleep. She’s, like, a genius, man! A creepy, awesome, freakin’ genius!

I am so, like, stoked now. My day — no, my whole life! — is complete. I just had to share this with all my FB BFFs. I’m going to go wash my feet now, jump into bed, and try that half-closed eye thing again. I’ll let you know if it works this time.

Oh my God! She is so, like, my idol.

Just sayin’ . . .

Brendochka
4/25/24